Relationships. Are. Everything.

Three simple words.  Huge meaning.  Don’t you agree?

Of course, relationships are the foundation of our personal lives, but they are at the core of our professional success stories, too.

Over the past 28 years, I’ve had the absolute honor of interviewing nearly 1000 women from every walk of life, first as the creator and host of Magic 106.7’s weekly Exceptional Women program and now as the host of The Story Behind Her Success podcast and radio series.  Without exception, when I ask women how they got to where they are today, they tell me about their village, their circle of support. And you know what else they say? “I’m a relationship person.”

As a communications coach (yes, I do that, too) clients often ask me how to develop their business relationships in a memorable, authentic way.  This can be especially difficult in a post-pandemic environment where so many of us work from home. The answer is simple, but it requires intention:  be a connector. Make no mistake about it, being a connector requires time and energy.  It means being the kind of person who makes the extra effort to connect one person to another in the hopes that something good will happen.

The truth is, friendships at work matter just as much as they do in our personal lives. Relationships in business create in-roads and opportunities that lead toward success.

Trusted relationships give us a wealth of knowledge when we need advice. They also give us a support network when we need a safety net.  Like a jewel at the bottom of the ocean, relationships are a treasure.  They expand our sphere of influence and enrich our lives.

And here’s the secret to building lasting relationships:

It’s not about you.  It’s about them.

When we do something large or small for someone else, we build what I call “karma equity” and good karma attracts great results.  Good goes around. I have lived my life by this mantra.

In his ground-breaking book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie wrote: “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people to be interested in you.”


10 Essential Relationship Building Blocks

1. Make sure your daily To Do List includes engaging with at least 1 person you don’t know very well or reaching out to a client, just to re-connect.

2. Small talk is BIG tal

3. It’s not about you, it’s about them.

4. Listen with intention and put away your phone.

5. Ask questions like: “What can I do for you” or “If there is ever anything I can do for you, please don’t hesitate to ask.”

6. Strive to be a connector, a problem solver and a resource.

7. Attend virtual and or in-person networking events regularly. Do this because you will always learn something new and/or meet someone new to add to your list of valued connections.

8. In the words of my mentor, Don Kelley: “do what you said you were going to do when you said you were going to do it.”

9. Never forget to return a favor and send a thank you note!

10. Remember:  when people are deciding who they want to work with, chances are:  they want to work with their friends.

For a weekly dose of inspiration, please download my podcast series, The Story Behind Her Success, available on all podcast platforms.  If you know someone I should feature on the show, I’d love to hear about her, just go to candyoterry.com.

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